Our Wedding Ceremony – The First Day (May 10, 2014)

Our Wedding Ceremony - First Day

Once in awhile,
Right in the middle of an ordinary life,
Love gives us a fairy tale…

What I’m feeling, I think, is joy…
I’ve felt that blinkered rush of happiness.
This might be one of those rare events that lasts,
one that’ll be remembered as months & years wind & ravel.
One of those sweet, significant moments,
that leaves a footprint in our mind…

It’s like I just wake up in the mornings,
and feel like I’ve just had the most incredible dream.
I’ve just dreamt my life…

The thing is, a photograph couldn’t ever tell its story.
It’s like something you have to live to understand.
Where things shift into focus for a moment,
and everything just makes sense….

Well, I know it’s like 2 months late post. But, like I said, I’ll make the post of our wedding story gradually, little by little. Because, sometimes to really being able to describe the big moment of our life with a carefully chosen words are still not enough to picturing those moments. It’s like something you have to experience it in order to understand it.

So, after Wedding Vows day, there will be wedding ceremony which will be held for 2 days. It’s a common thing in our culture, Minangkabau culture in West Sumatera, Indonesia. The first day, the ceremony will be mainly to be held at my parent’s house.

Going to My Wife’s House at Night After Wedding Vows

But, before wedding ceremony begin in the next day after wedding vows day, during at night, my family & relatives & our clan will take and accompany me to my wife’s parent’s house first. People from my clan would also bring the “rebana” (tambourine) group with me. (Note : “Rebana” / tambourine is one of classic music instrument used in Minangkabau culture).

Maanta Marapulai at Night After Wedding Vow

To be short, that night, when we arrived at my wife parent’s house, my wife family & relatives & their clan were welcomed us, and then after gathering and what not, Rebana group will play their music instrument as part of entertainment and also as part of showing respect to my wife parents & their relatives & their clan.

Barabano Maanta Marapulai

The value is that to acknowledge that my family have given me a blessing to move and live with the new family (my wife family) in a good will, and my wife family also welcoming me to be part of their family.

Wedding Ceremony at My Parent’s House

Then, in the morning, my wife family & relatives & their clan will bring & accompany me back to my parent’s house, where the first wedding ceremony will be held. This time, I’ve already official to be called Bride and Groom (in Minangkabau language, it’s called Anak Daro & Marakpulai).

Sebelum Berangkat ke Rumah Marapulai

Me and my wife was wearing wedding gown and its sets of accessories, which also reflect the Minangkabau culture. My wife was wearing “suntiang” on her head, and I was wearing “baju gadang basiba, sarawa guntiang ampek” with one kris (ceremonial knife) . This wedding custome, of course, only exist in the Minangkabau’s land.

After we arrived at my parent’s house, we both will sit in wedding stage / wedding stillage which have been designed in a way that reflect the Minangkabau culture, and so the party begin.

Pelaminan Wedding Ceremony First Day

People from my neighborhood, my parent’s friends, my friends, my brother’s wife & their relatives, and all other people who have been invited, will come to give us their blessing and congratulated us. It’s one of the day when me and my wife will be treated like “King and Queen” for one day. Hehehehe….

Of course, before the wedding ceremony being held at that day, the preparation have been done long way back. And I’m really grateful to my parents that have managed all preparations, and also the help unconditionally from my relatives & my clan. It’s one of the day when you realize the good of humanity, the sense of caring for each other, and willing to help you unconditionally. It’s not coincidence that most people said that wedding day is the blissful day, indeed.

Parting Words

Well, so that’s the first day. I’ll continue to write for wedding ceremony on second day. Like I said, It felt like I just wake up in the mornings, and feel like I’ve just had the most incredible dream. I’ve just dreamt my life…

Well my dear, now we feel no rain for each of us will be a shelter to the other. Now we feel no cold for each of us will be warmth to the other. Now there is no loneliness for each of us will be a companion to the other. We are two bodies but there is one life before us and one home. When evening falls I’ll look up and there you will be, I’ll take your hand, you’ll take mine and we’ll turn together. To look at the road we travelled to reach this the hour of our happiness. It stretches behind us, even as the future lies ahead. A long and winding road whose every turning, means discovery. Old hopes, new laughter, shared fears…

The adventure has just begun…

Wedding Vows (Ijab Qabul) on May 9, 2014

The May 9 2014 Day at Jami' Al-Syarif Mosque

This part of our lives,
this “once in a lifetime” part,
is called “Happiness”…

Starting from the day of Friday, May 9, 2014, will mark as the starting day on open-up the new chapter of our lives. This was the biggest moment of our life so far, a so called “the holly promise in front of God (Allah SWT)”.

May 9, 2014 is the day of our wedding vows which took place at Jami’ Al-Syarif Mosque of Sidang Koto Laweh, Tilatang Kamang, Agam, West Sumatera, Indonesia. Jami’ Al-Syarif mosque is also very near with my wife’s parent’s house.

Well, May 9, 2014 is the day when all pieces of puzzles finally falls right into its place, the day when two hearts sincerely commit to each other, the day when two families become one, the day that we both always have been dream of, the day when I finally able to call her the love of my life as “wife”, the day when she finally able to call me as “husband”, the most auspicious and blissful day of our lives, and the day that we’ll always remember on a lifetime.

I still remember that moment, saying out loud sincerely and genuinely of our “wedding vows”. In Indonesian language, it’s called “Akad Nikah”.

Ijab Qabul - Wedding VowsThe Wedding Vows (Ijab-Qabul)

Wedding vows word by me : “Saya terima menikahi anak kandung Bapak, Poppy Handayani, dengan maharnya satu cincin emas 5 gram, tunai, karena Allah SWT”.. The witness declare “sah” (legitimate) after that, and as such I’m officially married my wife. And thanks to God, I have to say the word of wedding vows only one time… :-)

The Two Families Become One
Getting married doesn’t mean I only marrying her, it shall also mean to unite two families (my family and her family). For me this is one of the most interesting aspects of marriage though; two families, which in general circumstances would never even know each other before, are tied together for life.

Us and Our ParentsUs and Our Parents

Yes, seeing their child finally getting married surely to be one of the day that all parents look forward to. And for us, words will not able to express how much our gratitude for both of our parents. The two families become one. Thanks Moms and Dads, for everything.

Well, there are two big days in any love story, the day you meet the girl of your dreams and the day you marry her. Well, here we are, finally able to make reality on getting married, tying the knot, and commit to each other, the perfect ending to a perfect love story.

And in the end, all we can do is promise to love each other with everything we’ve got. Because love’s the best thing we do…

Our Wedding – The Once in a Lifetime…


Bismillah

And here we are…

Armetra & Poppy Weding Invitation

The “Once in a Lifetime”…

Destiny is a pretty big concept, when you think about it.
Where you are in life, how you got there,
what would have happened if one thing or another,
had been different..

We do understand that the reason for the time exist,
is so that everything doesn’t happen all at once.
Fate has a way of putting an important event in front of us…

And, if it’s up to us for reading the sign of destiny,
It was a million tiny little things that,
when we added them all up,
they meant we were, indeed, supposed to be together.

And, I knew it.
I knew it the very first time we met each other,
11 years ago…

It was like coming home,
only to no home I’d ever known…

We do realize that love doesn’t change.
Love doesn’t become untrue.
Love doesn’t fade, nor disappear…

Well, It’s funny looking back at those days,
Because, sometimes,
Life slows down just enough,
for all the pieces of puzzles,
fall right into its place…

This part of our lives,
this “once in a lifetime” part,
is called “Happiness”…

Fabiayyi âlâ’i Rabbikumâ tukadzdzi bân”…

Remember, a wise man once said,

Barney Best Quotes 2

So, we will be honored
at your presence to celebrate with us, 
on our wedding, the once in a lifetime…

The Rollercoaster Life – Part 2 (Reflection of 5 Years in Real Life)

roller-coaster of life

Is every moment of our lives built before we’re born?
Maybe…I don’t know for sure..
But in life, there’s always ups and downs..
And they make life worth living..
We’ve never realized how high we’ve gotten,
without the perspective of how low we had actually been…



So, let’s continue this story. The first part is here. Well, in the summary, the first year after my graduation was the phase on a transition from college life to real life. It mostly about trying hard to figuring out how to be grown-up man, and trying to figure out, not necessarily who I am, but how to be who I am.

And, like I said, I felt thankful to experience the assignment to Field/Site at the first year of my career, because I was forced to learn faster about engineering. And yes, not only about technical things, but also in regards to personal development, because I also involved to work with many types of worker (blue collar, white collar, client/company man engineer) and many different character of people.

The 2nd Year – Back to Square One

Well, after long struggling & lot of hassle, harsh reality, and sometimes bully (again, you can imagine, as fresh graduate engineer working at Field/Site on small company with very tight schedule of EPC project nature, working 7 days per week, for sure it’s tough), then I decided to leave this first company when project almost completed.

Besides that, the harsh reality about working on EPC Project with project contract-basis, there will be no certainty once project completed. I mean, once project completed, I have to find other project to work. It was good experience in terms of technical though, but of course, I need something better, something stable.

I needed the better things in terms of compensation, more established company, and more stability concerning my future career path & career growth. Therefore, it means I was back to square one, become unemployment again, and I have to find other job.

Okay, this time was the lowest point of my life. It took me around 3-4 months to get a new job. During those 4 months, actually it was harder to find good job compare to “my fresh grad time” one year before.

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Preparing Married Life for Living Overseas

Marriage to Live Abroad

“Love doesn’t make the world go round.
Love is what makes the ride worthwhile…”
(~ARM)

Well, the time is near, and I’m counting days now. I’m finally arrived at the crucial stage of my romance life. The exciting & thrilling part, so to speak. It’s like, my romance life have been moving forward (in a good & exciting way), from “the topic of the who, the how, or the when kind of stuff, to the phase of finalizing & starting to execute for marriage life preparation.

And the big challenges are that, not only I have to prepare mentally or physically to marry the woman that I love, I even have to prepare & set-up the marriage life to live overseas for both of us. Big tasks are at the same time! So, I’m writing this post for every couple out there who lives abroad but is getting married at home, or planning a wedding from a distance. And not only wedding, but also “Life After Wedding” itself.

Supposed if you go to any wedding or marriage/love websites, or reading from magazine of book, I believe mostly they’re aimed at people getting married, or some section in regard to set-up marriage life after wedding, but definitely not for expats life. So, whether you’re male or female, young or older, planning a big event from the other side of the world (both in actual miles and cultural “distance”), have its own challenge.

As such, most of my energy & attention are very much focusing on this task nowadays. Although it’s kind of daunting, but I don’t let worry and stress overtake the joy I felt in preparing this. After all, this is the kind of thing for being in love, isn’t it?

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The Rollercoaster Life – Part 1 (Reflection of 5 Years in Real Life)

RollerCoaster Life

We can’t design our life like a building.
It doesn’t work that way.
Just take the leap, have faith to live it,
and it will design itself.
Well, It may become like a rollercoaster ride,
but we always have a choice,
to either scream or just enjoy the ride…

Well, life is really just going so fast. Somehow, I can hardly believe it. ‘Cause it felt like just yesterday that I graduate from college and being “thrown away” to a so called “Real Life”. And as this year kicking-off, I sort of forgot that it’s been more than five years since the day I got my first job, back in the end of 2008.

I think, this is surely a good time to reflect on what I’ve done for the past 5 years. Especially, I’m surprised at where I am at now, compared to five years ago. It may a long post, but personally, it’s worth my time to write & share it, as such I’ll write it on several part, and this post is the first part. As the saying goes, “It’s our experience that shape who we are”, right?

The Beginning

Back on October 2008, after recently-graduate, like any other recently-graduate, I was endlessly searching job, took job-test & job-interview in various companies, attended one job fair to another job fair, traveling from one city to another city. Starting from Bandung, and just in the space of two months, I went to visit several cities e.g Jakarta, Cikarang, Karawang, Bekasi, Depok, Cilegon, Pekanbaru, Duri, Semarang, Yogyakarta, Surabaya, even to Balikpapan.

Sometimes, I went from one city to another (faraway city) just in space of 2 days time. Even, I experienced one time where I was trying to rest in mosque, because I didn’t have time to find affordable place at the city I had never visited before. The harsh reality I had face at the time was it that, after countless job tests and all had the same ending, “no concrete job contract/offering”.

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Feeling of Resistance and Patience

The Pursuit of Happyness Quotes

When we pursue our dreams in life,
at some point we will inevitably encounter resistance,
stumble upon challenges we don’t want to deal with.
However, happiness is not the absence of problems,
but the ability to deal with them,
because nothing is absolutely perfect, isn’t it?

(~ARM)

This month, I became familiar with little thing called “resistance” in my daily job life. It’s kind of like temperamental toddler in my head, screaming & repeating, “I don’t wanna! I don’t wanna!”. It happens when I know I should do something, and I know I can do it, and yet, I just don’t wanna. And to make it worse, I can’t also saying “not to do it” just like that, even when I kept thinking, I wasn’t supposed to do it.

And yes, this kind of feeling bring back the old memories of my early career days working in my country. I know, in today’s busy workplace, this feeling of resistance can be easily sucked and sap our mental energy.

To be honest, I never thought that I’ll experience again this feeling when I’m working overseas. I don’t know, maybe It wasn’t life that was the problem, maybe it was my unrealistic expectations were clashing with reality. I had created a picture in my head of how life should be and when unexpected problems arise, I didn’t cope.

Focus on Long-Term, Weighing It Against The Reward

Everyone wants a job they love. We all want to wake up excited to go to work, spend our days accomplishing goals we’re proud of, and come home feeling pleasantly fulfilled. Oh, and somewhere in there, we’d like a paycheck that provides us with a comfortable lifestyle and may one day put our kids through college. That’s the dream anyway.

The thing is, there’s a natural give and take in career life. Usually, whenever something is gained, something else is lost. A wise choices, we must weigh the risks against the potential rewards. Make predictions and assumptions, and remember that one is not better than the other, they simply have different consequences, and, at times, great leaps of faith.

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Happy 26th Birthday, My Dear..

Hello there, my dear..

(I’m sorry that I can’t be there with you at this very moment.
But hopefully, this video specially made for you, can make you smile)..

My Dear,
For these 11 years,
I realize that love doesn’t change..
Love doesn’t become untrue..
Love doesn’t fade, nor disappear..

The truest test of anything, is time, indeed..

But, sometimes,
Life slows down just enough,
for all the pieces of puzzles,
fall right into its place…

In the end, I just want to say,
Happy 26th Birthday…
All the best for you…

It’s not only your birthday that I celebrate,
but many wonderful moments and stories with you..

You make tomorrow worth the wait,
and yesterday worth remembering…

The Leap of Faith – New Year 2014

 

UAE Fireworks

“When I look towards our future,
you are always pictured there..
Because, for the two of us,
home isn’t a place. It is a person.
And this year, let’s take the leap of faith step,
and say “we are finally home”..

Two years ago, I remember when I was going out when new year of 2012. That day, I looked out into the sea of Anyer beach, some fireworks buzzing in, and I couldn’t lie that most of the thing I felt in my heart was fear. I knew, that day, the path ahead of my life would not be smooth, it will be rocky and I may even felt like quitting at times.

So, I felt the fear that my life will be heading out nowhere, the fear whether I’ll be able to pick-up pieces in my life and continue to move forward, despite the harsh truth of reality and uncertainty, that life always throw at me.

But, in contrary, that was also the moment that I knew to become more Self-Acceptance. You see, as the saying goes, sometimes, things need to fall apart, to make way for better things.The eggs are already broken, maybe. So, let’s make sure, I get a pretty good omelet out of it.. For slight moment, I felt peace in my hearts that time, truthfully.

Realistically, and practically, I only had one choice – not only to accept, but to embrace the flow of life. Everything happens the way they happen. The only way I can adjust psychologically is to embrace the unexpected, and look for the good.

And, to be honest, that was the day that everything amazing was actually started in my life. An amazing thing that was far and far beyond my original dreams.

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27 Years Old – The New Chapter of Adulthood

Your greatest achievements of life,
are moments in time when what you’re doing,
allows you to see how wonderful your life already is…
Of course, the truest test of anything, is time..
And, the new chapter of my life story,
is about to begin..

27 years old!! Hmmm… It is kind of an awkward age — I’m not young anymore but also not too old, or still before the looming 30. It’s inbetween. So, 27 just sounded like a good time for things to happen. That said, 27 is going to be a year where a lot of things come together, and a lot of the foundations laid down since I was 22, come to fruition.

Some people say that, time changes everything. I think, it’s completely NOT true. It’s doing things that changes things. Not doing things leaves things exactly as they were. Because, the thing is, life always gives you two options, either you choose to put action “living your life”, or you choose to be a passive audience to your own life.

So far, 27 has been the strangest combination of courage, confusión, uncertainty, and happiness. But I like it, I think it went pretty cool. I mean, for these 27 years, there’s always a “surprise”, a completely unexpected things that happen beyond my wildest dreams, both good things & bad things.

As what I’ve experienced on living in real life since 5 years ago, life can take me for a ride and then drop me down. But, it is how to rise from there, and take steps towards, taking a ride back again towards where I wanted to go, is all that matters.

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