There are times in life when you need to just settle for less,
There are also times in life when you know that you deserve more,
And you need a push & courage to make a big changes for real…
that came when you honestly question yourself..
I remember this kind of week last year, (you can read it here), at the time, I felt indeed, my life was out of balance. Although, I’m ready to just settle for the kind of life that I was living at the time, as part of Self-Acceptance to the reality of life, but I can’t help myself to just wondering that I need big changes.
Maybe, at that time, I was juggling a lot. I know, at the time, things are (mostly) on track, and I can see progress in the different areas my life on career, romance, and other things. Overall, it is working. Yet, inside I feel overwhelmed, and some days – just downright tired from juggling it all. I felt that I should be split into different pieces to give the right amount of attention that everyone is asking from me. Yes, I felt, that there is something missing.
Well, I’m sure that most of us go through this at some point in our lives. You know that feeling that something is not quite right? That something is missing in your life? Maybe, we don’t really understand what it is, but it scares us. So much that we’re willing to do almost anything to make it go away.
Then, I asked myself to be brave enough to sit still and really listen to myself. That night, the tiny voice inside my mind, a voice startles me, just as I began to slide into sleep. “Go, dream, seize this moment”, it says. On other side, my mind stirs and answers sleepily, “Why? I already know what’s out there isn’t worth it that much. I have everything I need right here”. My mind is suddenly filled with a thousand concerns and a feeling of looming uncertainty wells within me like a slowly draining battery.
Tick, tock. Tick, tock. I heard the sound of my alarm clock, and I couldn’t seem to remember how long it’s been. It seems more like a dream — someone else’s life, not my own. The quiet metronome of the clock reminds me of the creeping complacency that’s slowly shrouded my life, like a cancer gone undetected until it’s too late. “I wasn’t always like this. What happened?”