Feeling of Resistance and Patience

The Pursuit of Happyness Quotes

When we pursue our dreams in life,
at some point we will inevitably encounter resistance,
stumble upon challenges we don’t want to deal with.
However, happiness is not the absence of problems,
but the ability to deal with them,
because nothing is absolutely perfect, isn’t it?

(~ARM)

This month, I became familiar with little thing called “resistance” in my daily job life. It’s kind of like temperamental toddler in my head, screaming & repeating, “I don’t wanna! I don’t wanna!”. It happens when I know I should do something, and I know I can do it, and yet, I just don’t wanna. And to make it worse, I can’t also saying “not to do it” just like that, even when I kept thinking, I wasn’t supposed to do it.

And yes, this kind of feeling bring back the old memories of my early career days working in my country. I know, in today’s busy workplace, this feeling of resistance can be easily sucked and sap our mental energy.

To be honest, I never thought that I’ll experience again this feeling when I’m working overseas. I don’t know, maybe It wasn’t life that was the problem, maybe it was my unrealistic expectations were clashing with reality. I had created a picture in my head of how life should be and when unexpected problems arise, I didn’t cope.

Focus on Long-Term, Weighing It Against The Reward

Everyone wants a job they love. We all want to wake up excited to go to work, spend our days accomplishing goals we’re proud of, and come home feeling pleasantly fulfilled. Oh, and somewhere in there, we’d like a paycheck that provides us with a comfortable lifestyle and may one day put our kids through college. That’s the dream anyway.

The thing is, there’s a natural give and take in career life. Usually, whenever something is gained, something else is lost. A wise choices, we must weigh the risks against the potential rewards. Make predictions and assumptions, and remember that one is not better than the other, they simply have different consequences, and, at times, great leaps of faith.

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That “Someday” is Today

No matter what you want in life,
you’ve got to take that first step..
Regardless how much metawork we do,
or how much we talk about what we want to accomplish,
in the end, it’s our actions that define whether we fail or succeed.
Take a step, even if it’s a small step..

I remember when I was teenager, that I used to say, “Someday I’ll become that person, someday I’ll get everything that I want, someday, and someday”. Even when I was in college, this “someday things” became part of me also. “Someday I will be rich, someday I’ll go looking for better job, someday I’ll travel the world, etc, etc”..

The truth is, this someday things are growth with me, that make so accustomed that there will be a someday in my life where everything will finally come together. I have to admit it feels good to write today in these new ground rules. Because these someday things are lies, lies, lies… It’s seems almost unfair that at such a young age we buy into these lies and get stuck forever in this fairy tale idea of life.

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The “What Next” Question

A wise man,
is one who after many years of learning,
still able to say “I don’t know”..
Because, life, all life, is about asking questions,
It’s not about knowing answers..

(~Allie Keys – Taken, The Series)

 You see, for me, life can be seen as a series of chapters – stepping stones, opportunities, branches splitting off into a million different directions, big and small decisions. These chapters may have obvious beginnings and ends, and sometimes those definitions are blurred. The key thing to keep in mind is that all segments flow together. Everything falls into place, whether we plan it that way or not.

With all chapters, there are underlying themes. There are questions that come and go with the passage of time. One of the questions that I could never shake was “What comes next?” No matter how far I ran in my life, it kept pace. Wherever I went, it’s like accompany me.

I remember when college graduation came and went, there it was again: “What comes next?” And this time, it wasn’t only my mind asking the question – it felt like the entire world was fixated with what my response would be.

It’s hard to think of it. It seems that I’ve done my part, you know. I did what I have to do. And, what to do next in life? This question is always asked by myself for these few weeks. Especially, when September is coming next, and I’ll celebrate my birthday, and it’s always the month and time where I reflect about my own life.

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Opportunity and Choice

Sometimes, opportunity knocks at the strangest times.
Well, I know, it’s not the time that matters,
but how I answer the door.
I mean, our life is defined by our own choice.
Our story may not have such a happy beginning,
but that doesn’t make you, who you are.
It is the rest of your story – who you choose to be…



You see, at every move in our life, we have to choose and proceed. We might like it or not. Life is nothing but a totality of conscious choices that we continuously make. Someone else does not choose for us in our life.

Sometimes we are left with no choice at all but to find ourselves at the crossroad of life, with two paths each beckoning and beguiling us. One is short, well kept, with flowery plants and bushes on both sides, so easy to negotiate, but ending up in a blank wall. The other is long, labyrinthine and bumpy, and difficult to negotiate, but ending up in a vast orchard of fruit-bearing trees and sweet-scented flowers.

For all I understand, where I am today is because of the choices I made in the past. But, Many times, I was at a dilemma just like, “To be, or not to be”, that is the question. It is easier to say this but, I know it isn’t so easy in practice, especially when those opportunities right in front of me.

There are no guarantees..

I don’t really know where a road will lead me until I take it. There are no guarantees. Nobody said that choosing to do the right thing all the time would always lead you to happiness. Loving someone with all your heart does not guarantee that it would be returned. Gaining fame and fortune does not guarantee happiness. Accepting a good word from an influential superior to cut your trip short up the career ladder is not always bad.

I mean, there are too many possible outcomes, which I really cannot control. The only thing I have power over is the decisions that I will make, and how I would act and react to different situations.

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The Lie to Ourselves, Stop It..!!

A man may become master of his destiny,
when he has power to influence his own mind..
If you aren’t doing it,
that means you don’t want it badly enough,
so stop kidding yourself..!!
Actions speak louder than words, definitely..

Are you…
…waiting to get the perfect job?
…waiting to perfect time to ask that cute girl?
…waiting to meet Miss Right?
…waiting to start living your life, on your own terms?
…waiting to an offering before you start the career you really want?
…waiting for someone, somewhere to tell you what’s important for you to do?
…waiting to give you permission to do what you want with your life?
…waiting for someone to take care of you?
…waiting for the great adventure finds you?
…waiting for the magic happens?
…waiting to start living, rather than just existing?

WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR..??

Look, there’s something that I need to get off my chest. I’ve been thinking about this for a while. And I’ve noticed that our habits are the most part that create our life. It’s our habit that are in charge of our life. Because, the things I do every day are pretty much what I did yesterday and perhaps what I’ll do tomorrow.

One of the things that separates us from “having the time we want” is that we constantly, blatantly, and unapologetically lie to ourselves about our scheduling, abilities, and our priorities. I don’t deny I do it myself. And it kills my time, slaughters my schedule, and smashes my plans to tiny little bits.

But in all seriousness, we do lie to ourselves. For example, when you say “I don’t have the time to …”, that’s almost certainly a lie. Since I can walked on this earth and observing other people, I know that nobody operates at 100% efficiency.

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The Harsh Truth of Career

It might not be today, it might not be tomorrow.
Sometimes, it’s hard to hear these things
but, in the end, they make you stronger.
I might not even make it myself,
but I sure as hell ain’t leaving without putting up a fight..


As you see, career means a long term path of what we do that have directions & goals. And the thing is, just like everything else in life, there also some harsh truth that we need to face regarding our career. So, here is some facts that based-on my experience on real world… 🙂

Starts at the bottom

Almost everyone starts at the bottom. Regardless of what you think you deserve, you probably will to. Get over it, and just get started. And the thing is, it’s not enough to be good at what you do. Talent and skill will only take you so far. It’s like video game, more problems solved, the more experience gained, and the more character growth.

Job Hopper Fact

If you find yourself job-hopping, moving from one career to other different career in a short time, and still, nothing ever satisfies you for any period of time, it’s time to look at yourself. Most likely, you’re part of the problem.

Professional growth requires discomfort

Embrace it don’t fight it. There is no learning in the comfort zone. Achieving long-term career goals requires sustained effort and deliberate action. It’s no accident or coincidence. It’s a process that takes time. Sure, it won’t be fun at times, but nothing is. Do you really want to stay where you are and look back at your life in the future and regret not having taken the steps to go after it?

Your career is all about YOU

If you’re unhappy with your career, it’s up to you to change it. Sticking around because you’re afraid will only dig you deeper into the rut. No one else controls your situation. No one else responsible. Stop asking for everyone’s opinion about what you should do. Again, it is all about YOU.

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Permanent & Grade Promotion

There are different kinds of journeys in life.
For some, you’ll have a clear destination in mind.
For others, you’ll wander until the right road appears.
Even if you know precisely where you want to end up,
the process of veering off-track with intention and curiosity,
that will reassure that your path is right…



Time is flying fast, don’t you think? It has been a year now, since the day I’ve arrived & join this company. After join in a company in a year, the good thing I expect is all about grade promotion & permanent offering.

You see, we all want to be recognized for our capabilities. So we work hard, learning all we can, and showcasing what we’ve got. The sound from our boss, such as “you have so much potential” is indeed, alluring music. But, the main point is, Sometimes, actions speak louder than words.

If we’re really that good, the offering will just come eventually. So, when I’ve been offered for permanent position & grade promotion, it reflect a recognition about my effort & what I’ve done.

You see, a promotion is like a deal, a business transaction, so I’m treating it as one. The higher grade, means higher salary, but also more contribution & more responsibility. It’s up to me to take control of my own career. And, this step is part of  “step by step plan”, in the big picture of my life.


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Learn to Let Go The Uncontrollable

Surely there is a time when you realize that,
it is a time to let some things go..
It’s the moment you realize that all that anger,
and worry just isn’t useful..
And you start to let go of it,
and just enjoying your life…
But, it just takes a while..


Life is constantly changing. But, there comes a point in life when I just get tired of trying to fix everything. I think it’s not giving up. It’s just realizing that I don’t need certain things or certain people and “the drama” they used to bring.

I think, sometimes, what happened in our life, can be so unpredictable, out of our control, and so stressful. But, as you grow older, there are things that you just have to let go, without any complain, and without looking it back. And yes, those things are usually the uncontrollable and the unchangeable, that will remove all the burden that we used to have.

Letting go of the uncontrollable and unchangeable in life is to admit the obvious truth, that I’m not responsible to affect a change or correct a problem which is beyond my competency, power, authority or responsibility.

It is releasing over-responsibility, giving permission to myself to be free from an over-responsible sense of obligation, duty or requirement to make everything “perfect” in my life and the life of others. Somehow, It’s getting rational about what I can and cannot do, becoming realistic about what is and what is not.

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Financial Freedom = Happiness

It’s not your salary that makes you rich,
it’s your spending habits..
Don’t let your fantasies speed-up your reality..
Bury your financial fantasies,
work hard, spend & invest wisely..
~ Charles A. Jaffe



Most people said, money isn’t important, or money does not buy happiness. How many times have you heard this? Lots of times, I am willing to bet!!! Many will argue that money is an object that, while making life a little easier, doesn’t or can’t buy happiness. My view is slightly different, and I think I’ve had enough “education” in this regard.

I mean, I do subscribe to the notion that money isn’t everything, but I also believe that it is a major, critical facet of life today. If we can take the need for money out of our life’s equation then we will be free to live life as it’s meant to be lived. But as long as it remains a means for survival, nobody can tell me money isn’t important or doesn’t create an immense amount of unhappiness and stress.

I mean, after pass the college and living in reality for few years, met a lot of people that having different socio-economic life, I realize that it’s not about “the money itself”, but the most important thing is the saving, or a sufficient continuous income. Because, our savings, believe it or not, affect the way we stand, the way we walk, and our self-confidence.

What I understand, the harsh truth is that, a man without savings is always running. He must take the first job offered. He sits nervously on life’s chairs because any small emergency throws him into the hands of others. Without savings, a man is often fearful of the present and the future. Being in a constant state of fear is a horrible way to live, right?


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The Art of Challenge

It’s not what you do, it’s why you do it..
It’s not what you see, it’s how you look at it..
It’s not how your life is, it’s how you live it..
Because, just like everything else in life,
with the right attitude, everything will just be easy..



As far as I understand so far, Life is pretty much a big wheel of wants. As we grow older, spinning that wheel will take us on many different challenges. Part of that journey involves an element called “Chance”. But, the truth is, we don’t know what chances or opportunity we’ll encounter during our life. Suffice to say, the real world is a lot more ambiguous. It can be overwhelming, stressful and downright daunting.

And that is the thing that I’m facing right now. You see, since last month, I’ve been handed a new opportunity on my job, which made me not only dealing with technical side, but also to manage, control, and guide the team who execute the task. I know, this is the start of a very independent period for me, one of big chance for myself to grow professionally. This time there’s a new element called big responsibility that has been added to the game.

And, with this chance, it comes the challenge, where I’ve been forced to deal on my edge of incompetence, get out of my comfort zone, scaling my frustrations, tolerate the uncertainty, filter something grey, control my emotions, persuade/influence people without being “bossy”, arguing in a good & respectable manner, learning to prioritize, divide my attention but keep focused on detailed, and surely learning to put my ego at the right time & the right condition.

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