“Life is like a camera,
just focus on what’s important,
capture the good times,
and if things don’t work out,
just take another shot.”
New Year has almost arrive, and by the end of year, it is always good time for me, for de-clutter. Just like all previous end of year, it’s a time to shake off the cobwebs and clear the path for new beginnings, get rid of things that no longer have value to me. I don’t mean the material possessions, but mostly way of thought, habits, feelings, etc. It’s an excellent way for launching pad to embark on a new season, especially for personal growth.
You see, how much does your life weigh? Imagine for a second that you’re carrying a backpack, feel the straps on your shoulders. Now, pack it with all the stuff that you have in your life. Feel the weight as that adds up. Fill it all into that backpack, people who has negative influences in your life, fill it also with memories that used to drain you, add it with habits that overwhelmed you, add the unrealistic ambitions or “fantasy goals” in your mind”, and add the “If Only” situations in your life. Now try to walk. It’s kind of hard, isn’t it?
I think, this is what we do to ourselves on a daily basis. We weigh ourselves down until we can’t even move. Now, I’m gonna set that backpack on fire. Let everything burn and imagine waking up tomorrow with nothing. It’s kind of exhilarating, isn’t it? Because, I’m sure that I don’t need to carry all that weight, I just want to set that bag down.
You see, the backpack is emotional clutter. It is figuratively a self made obstacle course that prevents me from processing my thoughts and feelings, moving from point A to B, a tremendous emotional and mental drain.
It’s all the things I’ve held on to, unconsciously, that are a part of an old identity, past jobs, defunct relationships, etc. It robs valuable time & mind-focus from my life. It takes away some of my life energy and often makes me wonder how I’ll ever organize it all.
Just by looking at it, makes me feel sad, tired, & overwhelmed. It keeps me “locked” in the past. It’s some kind “illusion” that’s really unnecessary. There is an old saying, “Get rid of what you do not need, to make room for what you do need. If you don’t remove it, is there room for “the new you” to emerge?”
As much as it might sound strange, sometimes we hold onto things in our life that no longer serves a purpose, but they are also at the same time holding us back from better opportunities because we don’t have room in our lives to receive them.
Simplify & Focus on The Essentials
I love when things are simple. Everyone has their ideal level of simplicity — as for me, what matters most is keeping what’s essential, and getting rid of the rest. Indeed, it can take courage and honesty to truly see what we really need and what we have simply been holding on to without much thought. Becuase, the whole truth about human nature is that we tend to make our simple lives complicated and messy. We take too much of what we need and keep them as ease.
The worries, the should’s, buried emotions, and repetitive stories that populate my minds and keep me caught in unhealthy patterns, it’s like “a confused noise” in my mind. I don’t know about you, but I am aware of some clutter I could stand to lose.
The goal of de-clutter is to eliminate the non-essentials and keep only what is needed. When it comes to the contents of my mind, the choice is where I would like to place my attention. It’s not an overnight things, it’s a process indeed. I’ve started these practices since a year ago. ‘Cause, as we change & grow older, so will our priorities, and I need to simplify.
Cut-Out Negative Influences
You may already be aware of the value of solid, supportive relationships in your life — the friend who picks you up when your down, celebrates with you when you’re happy, and shares events your life as they happen. You may not be as aware of the effects of conflicted relationships — the critical, unpredictable, or uber-competitive friend.
It turns out that these toxic friendships actually drain me. This is because I don’t always have strong defenses, so I can get taken off-guard. As for my life, I want to save myself grief, unnecessary drama or frustration, especially when I take an honest look at the relationships in my life, and decide which are worth maintaining, and which should be let go.
Of course, that means to start spending less time gossiping about problems, trying to stay out of people’s needless drama and don’t create my own.
Be Gentle to Myself
Many of reasons for hanging on to clutter are about fear. Fear that we won’t be equal to the challenges of the future, and fear of confronting our regrets about the past. Clutter can be comforting, it acts as a buffer between us and reality. But learning how to let go of these emotional clutter can be one of the most empowering experiences of life.
I mean, I’m sure that most of us have somewhere on some days, our minds can get noisy. Some of us even have echoes of voices from experiences of many years ago. As for me, I’ve also been extremely hard on myself, unnecessarily hard on myself, neurotic about the mistakes and bad decisions I’d made. Sometimes I’d fall asleep replaying my whole day in my head, every word and conversation looking for mistakes or ways to improve who I was.
To stop being so hard on myself, I had to learn how to discern the things that mattered and didn’t matter. And, that’s why the de-clutter the mind is helped a lot.
Needless to say, we have all felt and experienced inadequency in our lives. I also know that everyone has baggage, including me, it’s part of life. But like anything else, it’s easier if I remove it & let it go. I just need to hone in on the positive.
This is how I want to start my life in New Year.