Self Honesty

“The best years of your life are the ones
in which you decide your problems are your own.
You do not blame them on anyone, the ecology,
the environment, or even the president.
You realize that you’re responsible for your own life.”

(~ Albert Ellis)

As I am growing up, I’m slowly gaining consciousness through random encounters in my life. And, during this holiday (Field Break), it reached the peak point. I spent my time analyzed what I had done in my life, what I had achieved – and what was it worth? Am I the person who I want to be? Am I living my own value?

I’m trying to take a good hard look at myself, and I understand that It can be hard to just honest, to look ourselves in the eye and see what’s really there. Because, so often we see ourselves as something we’re not. And so often, we want others to see something different as well.

But, I’m now much more willing to do this. I’m not sure what has changed. Perhaps I’ve stopped judging myself so harshly, or maybe that I didn’t try to “justify” my actions anymore. Or maybe I’ve just experienced enough to know now that it’s the right thing to do.

Because, when I’m honest with myself, it means that I wasn’t afraid to confront my own imperfections anymore. I realize also, that I’m the one who’s responsible about my own life, whether it’s good or bad, ordinary or extraordinary, interesting or boring, happy or sad, etc.

You see, I’ve been waiting for this phase in my life to begin for a long time, a phase where I can be myself and not worry about editing my attitude or my behavior just to “fit-in”. It is the most liberating feeling, indeed. Nothing beats being really honest about who you are and what you need. All the rest just works itself out.

Above all else, I always want to walk the walk, not just to stand aside and watch, no matter what people say or think, in both my personal & professional life.

But, in truth, the biggest lesson I’ve learned is that we may think we know what the future will hold and we can plan down to the most minute detail, but really, when it comes down to it, nothing is for certain, and nothing is completely predictable. Sometimes, things just happen the way they happen. We cannot know what the future holds for us in exact way, right?

When I really sit down and think about it, I don’t need to know what the future brings. The thing is, as long as I keep trying as best as I can, then I’m sure that I can gain more and more clarity about the right path of success.

I hope that no matter what I do from here on, all pieces of puzzle will fall right into place, and my journey continues..

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One Response to Self Honesty

  1. Violet says:

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