The Changes..

Is every moment of our lives built into us before we’re born?
If it is, does that make us less responsible for the things we do?
Or is the responsibility built in too?


I don’t know..
As I grow up, lots of things change.
More responsibilities, more issues to deal with.
There are no excuses for mistakes I make,
I’m responsible for my decisions, and it influence not just my life.
That makes things more complicated and less enjoyable..

I laugh less, I enjoy less, I forget to call people I care about.
Sometimes, I pretend to be too busy.
It is tougher to believe. Tougher to dream.
It is tougher to be just happy. Especially when I want more from life..

You see, sometimes, The time felt changing too.
24 hours are not enough anymore.
I have to run somewhere.
To fix this, to clear that, to “fight”, to argue,
to prove myself right, to learn new stuff,
to earn more money, to work more.
Deprived of the privilege to actually enjoy life..

I have a luggage of sad memories, happy memories too,
broken promises, lost friendships, and missed opportunities.
I know what it is like to believe, to hope, to dream.
But I also know how it feels when every promise,
every feeling, every dream would break into pieces.

I don’t know..
I just…forget what it means to be real.
To be human, to be myself.
And, I just felt that I’m not the same anymore..

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